Starting a relationship 3 weeks before leaving for college was probably a bad idea...

...Especially when the clock ticks down and it's six days before you leave. I should have learned my lesson ages ago. Relationships mean emotional attachment, and that means dependence. But I never learn, and here I am.

So last Friday, I went on my date with The Loser. And it was fun. Of course, it almost wasn't. I picked him up, because I'm an idiot for dating a guy without a license, and started driving. And ran, at 65 mph, into some metal thing that looked like the door of a dog cage. So it was grating against the road and I was panicking and I pulled onto the shoulder... the wrong shoulder. But at that point I did not care. So I got out of the car, and pulled out the piece of the cage, only then I couldn't get back in through the drivers door because there wasn't enough space between the door and the guardrail so I had to get in through the back door and climb over the seat, except I got hooked by a fishing hook on a fishing rod some idiot had put in the car. "Some idiot" being my dad, who had gone camping. Anyway, I disentangled and de-hooked myself, and climbed into the seat. The Loser laughing the whole way. It was humiliating.

But then we went on to Alejandro's, and ate. And he paid! I wasn't sure whether he would. And then we went to the movie, and sat there in the theater for 10 minutes without even touching as I wondered whether he was actually interested in me, until he finally grabbed my hand. Actually he asked permission to hold my hand, which I found rather endearing. And then he put his arm around me, and I stopped paying attention to the movie. We saw Salt, but I couldn't tell you whether it was good because I honestly don't know.

And then on Monday I went to his house, to play videogames. Slightly lame in that I suck at all videogames. There are no exceptions. And so The Loser proceeded to beat me at Guitar Hero, Modern Warfare 2, and Halo. Then his younger sister came in, which was both a bad and good thing. Good in that she convinced him to quit playing videogames and put on something from Netflix instead, bad in that she sat there and WOULD NOT LEAVE so The Loser and I could only hold hands discreetly because his sister is a creeper. But then when I left he walked me to my car, and I kissed him. Apparently it was his first kiss. Which was odd. But oh well. He seemed to have liked it.

So yeah. That's basically what's happened with me and The Loser. And here I am. And it's weird. Because, I mean, I definitely love him. And he's said he loves me too. Which I love hearing... but always lurking in the background is the reminder that a few months ago, he was saying these same sweet, amazing things to Girl Scout. And it's hard for me to trust him. Which is stupid and hypocritical of me, as I've definitely said these things to other guys before. And I don't even know what's going to happen when I leave in 6 days.

Relationships and emotional attachment and dependence are all highly overrated.

But I love him anyway.

~Medusa

Thoughts on Dentists

I had to go to the dentist twice this week, for a checkup and then a filling. And these experiences have made me ask some questions.

For example, why do dentists insists on hanging up posters about various things that can be wrong with your teeth? There you are, lying in that stupid chair, bored out of your mind and then there are these POSTERS that make you panic and be like "Oh no, what if I have moderate periodontitis?" Hypochondria at the dentist's office. Not a fan. I am also not a fan of the anesthesia they use. Because it is not a pleasant sensation, the feeling that one side of your face is sliding off your skull.

Oh well. On the plus side, I have a date with The Loser tomorrow. We're going to Alejandro's for lunch, which will hopefully not result in my having a hysterical laugh attack similar to the ones I tend to have at Alejandro's with Dido. And then we are seeing Salt. Wish me luck! ...who am I even talking to?

~Medusa

[Dido's Note: Another thing about those posters on destist office walls: The drawings are usually AWFUL. I mean, I can't draw, but I can draw better than THAT.]

Love...

This was my wonderful IM conversation with Billy Bob last night... I love him... <3>

--Dido

SLUTS

Sorry, I've neglected this blog for a long time. :(

I had an interesting day at the beach a couple of days ago. I went on a walk in the morning to watch the sunrise, which turned out to be hidden behind thick clouds (FAIL) but instead I found a message in a bottle! Yes, dear readers, and I'm not joking. I was so happy and excited, although I'm sure that on the way home other walkers/joggers must have thought something along the lines of "GIRLLLLLL it's a bit early to be drinking wine, isn't it???" as they saw me walking along, grinning stupidly while holding the corked bottle.

The message wasn't very interesting, just from two girls who want an answer to their message, so I'll let them know I found their bottle.

Later that day I discovered a beached jellyfish, still alive, and in the true spirit of this blog, I dug it a channel to the water so it could be saved. I felt very heroic. Apparently I was not to be rewarded though, in the evening I was stung by a jellyfish quite badly.
Here are the remedies for jellyfish stings, embellished with my own experiences:
1. Rub the area with sand, wash with salt water.
2. Go home, complaining all the way.
3. Get shaving cream, spread on area, scrape off with credit card (This part hurts like the end of the world...)
4. Get vinegar, pour on area.
5. Discover that that was a waste of vinegar, get paper towels, soak with vinegar, apply to area.
6. Wince with pain as vinegar disinfects and removes stingy stuff.
7. Leave vinegar wraps on for 30 minutes, then remove and replace with fresh wraps.
8. Repeat until entire person smells like pickles, aka, is so sick of the smell that the pain is bearable, this could also be due to the vinegar wafts - perhaps they have an effect on the brain???
9. Go to bed, smelling pickled
10. Get up 2 hours later, shower
11. Go back to bed, smelling like pickles and shower gel.
12. Curse jellyfish.
13. Wake up.
14. Go back to the ocean, have a nice day, feel better :)

So that was that. Later we went to this tourist store, and I found little fridge magnets that read, for example:

"When I'm with you life sings"
"Forget Love, I'd rather fall in Chocolate!"
"People are supposed to make mistakes. That's why we have erasers."
"An optimist is someone who expects all the crayons to be in the box."
"My photographic memory never developed."
"Wait a minute... I need to put on my 'Gosh-I-Really-Care' Face."
"I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message."
"D.I.E.T. = Did I Eat That?"
"S.L.U.T.S. = Southern Ladies Up To Something"

I thought they were amusing :)

--Dido

Medusa would just like to say that The Loser is the most amazing guy ever...

...And that she kind of doesn't want to go to college yet because she doesn't want to let him go. Apparently there's this whole amazing, sweet, romantic side of him I had NO IDEA existed. And so I like him kind of a lot more than I'd anticipated. But honestly, if you were sent texts like...

"I think I just might like you more than I thought I did yesterday. :) I feel amazingly good at the moment. :) I kinda wish I could always feel like this. :)"

"I kind of like you. :) And I like saying that. Sorry if I sound sappy or repetitive. :P"

"I mean it. :) I think you're beautiful. :)"

...you'd probably feel the same. Anyway, ta for now. I keep thinking I'm going to wake up.

--Medusa

It's interesting how getting what you want can make life REALLY COMPLICATED.

Apparently, The Loser likes me back. Two simultaneous reactions here: 1) "YAYYYYYY! I LOVE LIFE!" 2) "CRAP! He just broke up with Girl Scout last week! And I leave for BYU in a month! And my parents would NOT be okay with this because of the age gap! ...NOW WHAT?"

And neither he nor I know the answer.

--Medusa

Oh and also, I wanted to share something hilarious Dido sent me the other day:

"Well I was just minding my own business in waist deep ocean water. All of a sudden I heard this loud wave behind me & when I turned around there was a 10 foot wave right on top of me and it crashed down and I went under and got turned over about 3 times and swallowed a bunch of water and it all got in my eyes and nose & I thought I would never get back up bc I had no idea where I was. And I thought I was gonna die. My last thoughts would not have been about my life or friends or family. No. They would have been: "Damn. I haven't heard all of Lady Gaga's songs yet. Well this sucks."

"Creative Blog Title Goes Here"

A conversation between Medusa and myself on my birthday.
This should be self-explanatory:

Me: My cake had 19 candles on it and the flames were somehow different colors. When I blew them out I wished with all my heart and soul "Billy Bob." That is all.

Medusa: Bahaha I did the same thing on my birthday... with the Loser...

Me: You know. I am starting to think we are the losers here :)

Medusa: I feel like you're right. Hahaha

Medusa: ...in the process of cleaning my room I found a small glass figurine of what appears to be the virgin mary. I have no idea where it came from or what it was doing under my bed. WTF. haha

(later...)

Me: That is so weird. Haha. Wow. I found some interesting t h ings in my closet which I threw away imediately. Yay packing! XD

Medusa: Haha I guess. I'm currently in the middle of one of those ridiculous emotional breakdowns over everything and nothing.

Me: Oh. Not good. Why? And eat some chocolate? Feel better... :(

Medusa: I don't even know. hahaha. General worries about EVERYTHING. Probably because I'm pmsing. When I wake up tomorrow I'll be fine. blahhhh. haha

Me: Aggh I hate being a girl! And I hate the universe for being a man bitch. Poor you. :( Seriously, men are so much better off.

Medusa: It's true. gah. I vote we kill them ALL. haha

Me: Yes except Johnny Depp. :)

Medusa: Yeah... and Taylor Lautner. And Brad Pitt. I just watched Mr. And Mrs. Smith. hahaha

Me: And Billy Bob. Always Billy Bob. Hey you like motorcycle men. Taylor Lautner has one! In the movie at least. Haha

Medusa: Hahaha very nice. Actually I kind of do...the bad boy vibe is quite attractive. Which is ironic because I refuse to ever ride a motorcycle. But yes, we can save Billy Bob if you like. And the Loser. Regrettably, I'm rather attached. :/ hahaha

Me: Yeah let's save them. However if there are only 5 men left alive the competition will be AWFUL.

Medusa: We save them... but put them somewhere else, like the moon. Then we go live on the moon with them, keeping ours and sharing the celebrities between us, while the newly female world eradicates poverty, global warming, the energy crisis, and the problem of the toilet seat being left up. hahaha

Me: Can I please put this conversation on the blog? Hahahahaha

And the rest is history! But really. I laughed so hard for most of this.

--Dido